You placed desires and longing deep within me
only to be satisfied by You.
A grand design, to draw me to Yourself.
I grew in belief of Your goodness
I grew in hearing words spoken of Your atonement.
I lived in a house where Your Spirit
hovered and transformed my parents.
But yet I had not yet heard Your voice,
experienced Your nearness.
I lived in dutiful obedience to Your ways,
propelled forward by the blood of Your sacrifice.
I lived in ignorance to Your desire for me to KNOW You
to HEAR You, to truly LOVE You.
You deserve my obedience, I gave it out of duty.
You deserve my time, I gave it out of habit.
You deserve my praise, I gave it for the esteem of men.
You deserve my affections, I kept them far from You
and shared them hastily with many.
I believed in You intellectually, Jesus the Son and Abba the Father.
I had yet to experience the One who teaches and leads me into all truth.
Believing You were powerful, but never receiving Your empowering.
Proclaiming You had washed me clean, but never receiving sanctification.
And slowly my mind was clouded with compromise.
Gradually I was unable to see darkness from light.
Choice by choice, I was walking a broader path without any absolutes.
Denying the nagging feeling of conviction,
pretending I was still seeking You.
Disregarding a need for repentance,
the grayness over my eyes continued to deceive me.
Just the same, the longings You created me with
were yearning to be filled.
I filled them with everything and anything
counterfeit to the way You satisfy.
Suddenly it seemed these valid needs
were open wounds, infected by shallow gratification.
And in a moment there was a ray of light through
the dreary cloud, and a twinge of hunger for Your Word.
As Your Word filled me, I became less hungry for anything else.
I wanted true remedy for my broken condition.
Was there anything powerful enough to break through the shame?
I had believed it, but had yet to brush up against Your power.
While fasting You brought deliverance to my wounded longings,
from reliance on false idols.
I had never felt this gift of hunger before,
I was undeniably aching for more than intellectual understanding of You.
Your fiery presence reached violently into my identity
and spoke light and truth to my inward parts.
My mind: renewed by the resurrection power of You, Holy Spirit.
Never before had I heard Holy Spirit with such clarity, much more than vague whispers.
Soon, loneliness seems far from me
and Holy Spirit, You call Yourself "Chandler's Best Friend."
You comfort me where I long to be comforted
You fill and meet me where no one else can.
You, Holy Spirit, speak truth over my destiny.
You are the power of God for those
who repent, believe, are baptized, and receive Your Spirit.
I am empowered by the indwelling of Holy Spirit
beyond the power of cancelled sin.
You are setting me apart to be a pure Bride for Jesus' return.
You have called me from darkness into Your marvelous light.
I have tried everything else
and now I say with full confidence,
"Only You, revealing Yourself, can satisfy fascinate captivate me."
Come, Holy Spirit, reveal the love of God
in Jesus Christ that surpasses mere knowledge.
You're worth my obedience, I give it because You're real.
You're worth my time, I choose to give it because I've experienced Your goodness
You're worth my praise, I worship the God I personally know is alive.
You're worth my affections, I return the affection You've shown me.
Can I have more of You?
No longer bound by duty,
I am willingly inhabited by the fullness of God.
He is constantly forming me,
moving within and through me.
Continually drawing me closer still,
from before the foundations of the earth You've been reaching out for me.
You are not far off,
You are always desiring my affections.
You lead me in paths of righteousness
for Your name's sake.
You restore my soul.
You are the friend that sticks closer than a brother.
Surely You pursue me daily.
You will dwell with me forever.
Even so, Holy Spirit, come and touch my heart
and go past my own thoughts
reveal the transcendent thoughts of God.
Empowering Spirit, lift my gaze higher than my weakness.
Show me Your ability to redeem
and continue working in me an eternal weight of glory.
Christ's Spirit within me, my everlasting hope.
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